“You never listen to me, why should I listen to you?”
The driving force, adolescents are becoming more independent and making identity. More experience of parents in youth parted from them and spend time with friends. What I heard most parents worry about the influence of his friends was in his teens with respect, how they behave, dress, and experiences of the drug. More often, it is a concern when they see a big change in their relationship where they spent their teenage contradict their curfew or the amount of time with your friends.
There are five tools that encourage parents to manage conflict with your teenagers reduce the infighting that feels can use it as a tug-of-war.
1. Choose Your Battles
If the same argument over and over again, then it’s time to step back and see what happens. I hear a lot of frustration to explain to communicate with parents. There is often a negative attitude and contradicted their teens when it comes to setting limits. There are times when a parent, you say no, and your child will have a reason to say no, because they were asking that you consider to be unfair. The challenge for parents is that they need to justify the set limits, because no one comes to say is not good enough to listen to children and young people. I encourage parents to develop a dialogue with them.
He expressed the hope that, in exchange for more freedom for them is a necessary conversation. For example: “If you perform tasks and duties, then you can go out with friends” or “I understand you want to meet friends and family night tonight, so I want to spend more time with you.”.
2. Express Interest and Avoid Humiliation
Do not be quick to respond to changing teens how they dress, dying your hair or paint the nails. Sometimes young people want to be noticed and your identity, your appearance, which is surprising to discover can be at times. Expressing curiosity in his new look signaled on your interests, who they are, and no judgments about their appearance, which is a major annoyance for teenagers with their parents and just keep the distance between them. It allows more in your relationship with your child something they have or fad or trend that must be done. Book your judgment to a permanent change in their appearance, like a tattoo or destructive behavior, such as smoking or drugs.
While this helps prevent the problems of his son as a rejection or normalize bad breakup, saying things like “more than a week, it will not even matter.” or “You’re too young to be in a relationship.” Saying things like that can make you think a teenager you do not understand, or anything that is important to them trivial, they judge. Rather than validate what they feel, they know what they are feeling is normal, and recognize the feeling, expressed directly or communicate with body language or facial expressions, “I see you feel excited and reasonable.
How many times you may find yourself at odds with your child to set limits and that the “bad guy” It helps to put aside their differences and focus on something positive. Call your teen to something positive they did. If you do not think that there is something positive, then observe. You can something shocking about it you do not know how creative or interest in something they feel is important to learn. Teens can get things parents and materials, but more than this value, the parents feel about them (although they will never admit it).
Disagreements soon took an ugly turn when anger and guilt are thrown together. Expand parents when their teenage children interviewed offended. Frustration can be expressed in words, “You make me angry with their bad attitude, now you make room!” Practice patience and modeling respectful adolescence, both the tone of the conversation and not as an argument, and help to make your own sense of self-control and calmness. Use “I-statements” within the communication will help to learn to save your child how they feel, for example. “I feel very frustrated that you keep talking to me, and if you are quiet and respectful for me may talk, we can talk again. “
Although there is an approach to a positive relationship with your teenager can solve a big difference in how parents in conflict with their teens and keep communication open with these five panacea tools. Bad habits are hard to break and create a new one can be so hard, but parenting can make a big difference and bring parents and adolescents.